Hello, friend! My name’s Luna. My human says that means moon, which I often think looks like a giant flying bean in the sky.
I think that’s why my wolfy ancestors howled at it. With no human preparing them delicious dins, their tums were probably growling like, well…wolves, and there’s that big beanie treat just floating there, big enough to feed the whole pack.
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What’s your favorite kind of bean? My human loves baked beans slathered all over cheese and toast, mostly the morning after they’ve had too much silly juice.
Oh, friends, let me tell you…those morning snacks smell divine. I’d like nothing more than to share some of those saucy beanos and chomp, chomp, chomp, but I’m not allowed because my fluffy belly would go all squiffy.
It’s not just because they’re salty and sugary. The main reason is that they’re full of garlic, onions, and tomatoes, and even though these smell scrumptious when my human puts them in a pan and cooks them up, my poochy insides don’t like them. It’s really no fair!
If you think garlic and onions smell nice to you, our noses are thousands of times more sensitive than yours. It’s tragic really.
Can Baked Beans Kill Dogs?
Those treacherous beans may make me feel very sick or even poop all over the house, but they probably won’t kill me. I might not even get poorly if I have just a lick.
If I gobble a lot of them, I can get very ill indeed, and possibly even die. The onions can give me hemolytic anemia, a nasty thing that kills my red blood cells, garlic and tomatoes are poisonous to me, and sugar and salt can give me doggy diabetes and obesity.
Even if I slurp up the sauce and survive the beany death, there’s a good chance my poops are gonna get real runny, so consider this a warning, friend.
Do Baked Beans Make Dogs Fart?
I’m offended that you’d think we need baked beans to fart. Farting is an ancient doggo art, but if you must know, yes, baked beans can give us one heck of boost in that smelly yet hilarious department.
Beans are full of fiber, and when you eat lots of this stuff, it makes pooping real nice and easy, but you have to pay the price: loud, stinky toots all day and night.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a fluffy pup or a fleshy human, the toots are a’ comin’, make no mistake. But when you combine all that fiber and the non-pup friendly sauce in our guts, it makes for a very troublesome time indeed!
Not only do our toots flow endless from our bums like hankies from a clown’s pockets, but it gives our poops rocket power and our poorly tums go big and round.
What Beans are Safe for Dogs
With all this talk about the pitfalls of the saucy breakfast bean, it’s easy to forget that plenty of beans are scrumptious treats for me and my poochie pals.
Some of my dinners have beans in to boost the meaty goodness with plant protein and fiber, but you have to be careful. Not all beans are friends.
We can munch pinto beans, black beans, soybeans, garbanzo beans, green beans, butter beans, lima beans, lentils, and white beans.
We’re also partial to the odd kidney bean too, but they’re a very sneaky bean, friends. We have to be careful around them. They’re poisonous for humans and pups unless they’ve been soaked and cooked.
These bean friends help to regulate my blood sugar and keep me from being moody and unpredictable. They’re full of protein, which I need to build up muscle and lots of energy for zoomies in the park. Vitamin A is good for my heart and helps to keep my eyes sharp.
Vitamin C and K help me recover when I get an ouchy and stop me from getting sick. Potassium gives me strong bones.
Magnesium helps my belly suck up all the nutrients in my food, and finally, the antioxidants lower my cholesterol and keep my joints from creaking.
What Beans are not Good for Dogs?
Now let’s woof about the evil beans. Keep these nasty little snacks away from us because we can’t be trusted not to have at least a little taste when they’re within licking distance.
- Baked beans, we’ve already barked about these.
- Fava beans make me throw up on the couch.
- Refried beans have garlic and onion in, and even though they smell great, they’re bad for our fluffy tums.
- Canned beans are full of stuff that keeps the beans from going squiffy, but they do the opposite to my belly.
- Chili Beans are loaded with spices, onions and garlic.
- Coffee beans are the worst of all. They contain the sleep gobbler, caffeine. If we get our jowls on some of those, it can affect our brains forever and even send us off for the long nap.
- Uncooked kidney beans are a big no-no!
Final Fluffy Thoughts
Well, my human friends, thank you for listening to my beanie barks here today.
Now your brain should be so full of beans that you’ll probably go straight to the kitchen and make yourself some beans on toast, but that snack’s strictly not for your doggo pals.
Don’t get us wrong; we appreciate the gesture, it’s just not healthy for us.
Feel free to treat us to some of the good beans we’ve woofed about, but remember that even the bean friends from our list can do our bellies an ouchy if we’re given too much.
Beans should never be more than 10% of daily doggy calorie intake. As beanies can be so full of calories, you should only give us a couple at a time. That’s plenty for us.
I’d like to bring things to a close by quoting the great poochy poet, Wagspeare… ‘To bean or not to bean? That is the question’.